This four-part Naikan series grew out of a course I offered at Baltimore Dharma Group in Spring 2025. While Naikan is often framed as a tool for self-reflection, I came to see it as something more relational: not a system of correction, but a practice of returning—again and again—to what holds us, what flows through us, what we leave behind, and what we remain with.
Here, in language, is the closest I have come to tracing the patterns I live inside — and the patterns I see others living inside, too. ...That, to me, is the heart of this offering: not to win empathy through performance, but to make coherence inhabitable — even when the pattern isn't matched. These pieces are not arguments. They do not aim to persuade. They exist to demonstrate — without explanation. To resonate — without claiming universality. To name the cost of asymmetry — without blaming the other. To hold clarity — without self-erasure.
Introduction and Intention:
This is a sutra, but not a sutra in the traditional sense. It is not part of the Buddhist canon, nor is it offered from a seat of transmission or formal authority. It is, rather, a thread — woven from lived practice, shaped by fidelity, and rooted in a vow that did not begin with me and does not end with me.
We all have moments of deep concentration—those times when we are so absorbed in something that the world recedes. A musician practicing alone, refining a passage with exquisite focus. A philosopher turning an argument over in their mind, testing its weight from every angle. A scientist working through the layers of an equation, adjusting variables, refining the logic until it holds. In these moments, the noise of the world fades, and what remains is a kind of clarity, a steady presence of thought moving toward resolution.
Introduction: There are two doors into this work. The one below meets the moment. It is written in accessible language—for those seeking clarity about autistic experience, and especially about how it differs in rhythm, in structure, and in the invisible labor it asks of those who must translate themselves to be understood. But this isn’t the only way in. There is another door—quieter, less translated, more interior. If you're looking not just for insight, but for shape—if you’ve ever sensed that what goes unspoken is sometimes the most coherent thing there is—you may find yourself at home there.
Before you begin: please take a moment, settle in, enjoy the image above—of me holding my baby daughter as a first-time dad, tune into the frequency of restful wonder. Now allow your mind to wander outward from the edges of that image: to the room, to the street outside, to the vast sky beyond the vast sky. Further—past the solar system, past the galaxy’s edge, past everything known—to the edge of the cosmos. And then…
I never stopped making art. I just didn’t always call it that. What I made with you, my loves — in those days we shared — was the most embodied form of relational creation. Art was us — there was no interruption.
Something Luu Li and and I talked about yesterday landed deeply. She said, “Wow Papa, 54 years! I'm so glad you’re starting to do art again.” And I told her — honestly — it’s never left me. But after that, I found myself thinking: when I was homeschooling Luu Li and CT, I wasn’t just not doing art — I was expressing my creativity through my life with them.
Cát Tiên's rarin' to go. She may just skip crawling, and we could be in for some furious mobility. So, what's the best baby-proofing for the house? At the moment, I'm agnostic about the options below. What do you parents think?
Option 1: Buy a play pen. The least expensive with most play area is the "North States Superyard XT Gate Play Yard". The basic six-sided version provides about 18 sq. ft. of play area. (Effort: 1 hr., Cost: $60.79, Amazon.com).
Option 2: Construct play pen out of pine slats from an ikea bed base. Play area will be 31 sq. ft. (Effort: a weekend, Cost: $40, IKEA).
Option 3: Leave the space open, and pad the brick walls. This option necessitates following Cát Tiên around until she's stable on her feet, and continuing after that if she develops super-inquisitive tendencies. (Effort: 2 hrs., Cost: $20, supplies for padding).
Visualizing Option 1 and 2: This little movie shows how the plastic play pen (the inner hexagon) compares to the wooden play pen made of ikea bed slats. The little baby in the middle is 26" tall, or Cat Tien's current height.
That means no floor lamps, and half the furniture in storage. The only things of monetary value we have are our laptops, which is the one thing she interacts with pretty delicately. She seems to know it's for watching her videos.
the animation is excellent. if you figure out a way to keep baby still in real life we will pay big bucks for a consult :)
from our limited experience no corral is not an option. i would probably go for the $60 prefab and call it a day. cat will love having her own space and you don't want to wait until she is so mobile that she feels trapped.
cian thinks the corral is his own play room (so far so good)
I love the movie! Could watch it all day. Can't wait to hear what others who've had toddlers would recommend.
ReplyDeleteCheers,
Christina
This girl is raring to go - it's her life now! OPTION 4: Move valuables to storage.
ReplyDeleteLife begins anew - Grandpa Joe
Thanks for the advice Dad. :)
ReplyDeleteThat means no floor lamps, and half the furniture in storage. The only things of monetary value we have are our laptops, which is the one thing she interacts with pretty delicately. She seems to know it's for watching her videos.
the animation is excellent. if you figure out a way to keep baby still in real life we will pay big bucks for a consult :)
ReplyDeletefrom our limited experience no corral is not an option. i would probably go for the $60 prefab and call it a day. cat will love having her own space and you don't want to wait until she is so mobile that she feels trapped.
cian thinks the corral is his own play room (so far so good)