My Beloved Home April-May 2015

Saturday, May 2

Meeting Charlie. When the curfew was over, but national guard were still patrolling the Inner Harbor, helicopters still flying overhead. I went there with the girls, because this is our home and biking around was our way of caring for it. We’re not gonna abandon our home. Also I wanted to find out what the pulse of the city was after having been cooped up at home for a week. Very few people were out. Charlie was a young black man who worked as a guide, one of many the city hired for the Inner Harbor area. Gracious man. We connected. I asked him how it was going for him and his family. He said “we’re hanging in there.” I asked him about whether he was originally from Baltimore. He said his family came from Georgia. And his father had been lynched. Broke my heart.

Friday, May 1, 10:15 PM

Their anger is broad, and they feel systematically brutalized by society. We who live in privilege can just move on. I am tempted to move on, but this is an opportunity to care more.

Thursday, April 30, 1:43 PM

Discussion on “race” or black ninjas and white ninjas.

Thursday, April 30 11:16 AM

We biked to the Inner Harbor and hung out in Barnes and Noble where CT wanted to get some books she could read to Luu Li.

Here's a video: https://www.sparkcamera.com/v/fEFCIiEKb6

Outside it's quiet and calm with a slight but visible National Guard presence in public areas around the harbor which I would describe as "milling about" (resting on benches, checking iPhones) rather than in "high alert" mode. Girls will be going with Christina on a retreat this weekend about an hour north on a beautiful spot by the Chesapeake Bay. I expect there will be a lot of activity in the city this weekend. Will keep everyone updated.

Thursday, April 30, 9:37 AM

Last night we biked out to our local park, and it was buzzing with children, people in the basketball courts, football field, a group of local African American girls cheerleading troop. I had a sense that this was an indelible moment in our shared lives, but we are up and not down. Rediscovering Baltimore’s resilience, I think gives all confidence to move forward with the difficult task of solving these intractable problems in our society.

Much coverage (even in the Baltimore Sun) is understandably negative, but there is this from one corner of Baltimore’s community: here is Kevin Planck, CEO of hometown Under Armour, a Baltimore supporter, and leader among businesses here. He is making the needs of this community a priority — this eruption will not fall on deaf ears this time as it did in 1968, and I think investment in the long run will go up instead of down. There will be many more views in the coming days, and maybe a growing consensus. But we have to keep the support going, to let people know that they are cared for. This is also a majority African American city, and their voices will not be unheard.

Here are the girls playing last night:

Wednesday, April 29, 4:26 PM -- Letter to Ted

Thank you Ted. I agree with and appreciate everything you've said. However, this is a tragic photo to me.

I put myself in the place of the children in those neighborhoods, and through their eyes I see a frightening invading force. What has been wrenched from these children is any possibility of safety in the world, of trusting those who they should be able to trust to protect them. This image actually is a symbol of our ignorance as a society of how we create the next generation of angry young adults. There is deep pain in these neighborhoods that is unaddressed in this photo--a loss of basic safety and trust in the world. Sure the actions of the looters was a kind of mob insanity, but it is the tip of the spear which is an impassioned anger about the inequality that hurts people every day of their lives and that they can't seem to get others to believe is so, unless they harm themselves.

There was an image a while back from Portland Oregon of a white police officer who came over to a young black protester and they embraced, and he let that young boy cry on his shoulder. I would nominate that as an inspirational image of the events arising since Ferguson.

We were just driving back from Virginia now, and on the freeway a few miles outside of home, CT said, "I can't wait to see our city." I laughed then, but I'm crying now thinking about how such a birthright, a sense of safety, will be impossible for some of those African American children.

Wednesday, April 29, 9:36 AM

Dear Loved Ones,

It is a beautiful morning in my beloved town. A place I have made roots over the last ten years. I just wanted to let you know we are safe and solid — though having gone through an experience of being shaken to the core.

Baltimore, why I love to live here is that it is an authentic place — doesn't pretend to be other than what it is. It is a place where people work hard, thrive, have setbacks. It is not a place anesthetized by a fiction of itself.

I feel hopeful going forward with greater awareness, greater compassion, greater effort. Ultimately, I am reminded to do everything for the sake of this moment.

With love,

Luu

Tuesday, April 28 5:07 PM

Peaceful where we are, occasional helicopter overhead. I was downtown around 2pm. Here's a video I took https://www.sparkcamera.com/v/6jHyWPKXW2

Tuesday, April 28, 10:50 AM -- Letter to NiOsho

All is well where we are. But we are very saddened by the suffering of our fellow Baltimoreans in other parts of the city.

The curfew and state of emergency are mostly meant for the areas with unrest, and I feel deeply for the safety of everyone in those areas.

I felt that what we could do was to remain calm and to look deeply into ourselves, doing what we could do for the sake of peace. Last night we lit a candle and incense before the altar of Avalokiteshvara. Myodo and I chanted the Heart Sutra and Kanzeon, then dedicated the recitation to the safety and well-being of the demonstrators and the police and all in those neighborhoods.

This is a chance to also see our responsibility in all this — to resolve to move forward with greater awareness, compassion and effort. Sometimes our indifference is what is harming. I sense that what is happening in the African-American neighborhoods is the cry of a long suffering people.

So there is this heaviness here with us. At the same time, it is a beautiful, peaceful morning on our block. I had a chance to go to our community garden and work in the soil for a bit. I feel a sense of hope even though I don't know what will happen.

Monday, April 27, 7:29 PM

Dear Friends and Family,

I understand there have been a lot of news reports of the unrest in Baltimore following the young man's death. I just want to let you know that we are fine here, fortunate to live in a safe neighborhood, and saddened by the suffering befalling our fellow Baltimoreans who don't have that privilege.

The events that have transpired arise from fear and deep wounds, and we are trying to do our part, what we can do, to find peace. To that end we are consuming only the minimal news bulletins. In particular, there is not constant blaring of TV or radio blow-by-blows in the background.

This is for our sake to maintain equanimity and for the girls' sake as instilling unnecessary worry in them is a way of harming them which we do not want to do if possible.

How to help: if you have a practice of prayer or contemplation, or even would like to read a book about non-violent struggles for equality and justice, that would be a helpful action to take. In our house, we have lit a candle and incense before an altar of Kwan Yin the bodhisattva of compassion to help us direct our energies of anxiety and confusion towards calm and understanding.

May everyone be well.

With love,

Luu